Friday, December 5
watch the night sky fading red!

Wow yeah indeed. Don't ask. I'm wearing sunglasses right now bc i cant find my glasses and these are prescriptioned. From 5th grade. So they are pink and to small for my head. I sang the song to Mark and Ashley, mark knew the song, but they both thought I was insane. Whats new about that?

Will: Fish gotta swim birds gotta fly i gotta love one man til i die can't help lovin that man of mine
Jack: *walks in* hey listen, sister! I love my mister now!
Both: Tell me he's lazy tell me he's slow, tell me i'm crazy, maybe i know, but i cant help lovin that man of mine!
Will: Take it jackie!
Jack: *some frnch ballet terms* and souffle! I'm gay!

Man. I love this show so much. Hey, Jack just used scott's saying, oh well. hm. i miss him. in new york its probably snowing. i want snow. i bet you it isnt snowing right now. I have no clue. Haha I just sent ashley to go look for me. What a good husband she is. Wow, we both don't know. Ah well. Tomrrow I am doing NOTHING. I wanna do... something. Anything. Oh well. Sleep counts.

Earlier me and ashley were talking about the funniest stuff. "i was.. then.. went back to... then.. i made the... my mom came in" . No, its not what you were thinking. But it was so funny man. Retarded cotton pony.

Bad crampage,
-Jessi

Posted at 10:07 pm by BlackandWhite
[For me?]

Evil, thy name is Wave.

Wave. Crimson wave.

  Bopshoobopshoobop. Kay, mom called me in her room. 2:30. Sunday. MRI. Along as I ride the crimson wave. This is so uncool. I dont wanna goooo, but of course I have to. So now i'm watching will & grace and drinking cherry coke. It's pretty good like. I never watch will & grace except every now and then.. this show rocks. Hah, Ben B last year told me that he watched the show which is how I started watching it. we both must be queer. like jack. jack rocks. JUST JACK! Oh hey ben... what IS a spitchcock? We never did find out ya know.

Watching gay guys on TV,
-Jessi

Posted at 07:34 pm by BlackandWhite
[For me?]

oh oh and oh

I MUST TAKE A MOMENT TO WISH MY V V V BESTEST FRIEND KARA RAWLINGS A V V V HAPPY BDAY AND REMIND HER SINCE SHE IS NOW 15, SHE IS HALFWAY TO DEATH! LOVE YOU! MMMHMM!
OH AND REMEMBER "YOU SO SESSY!"

Posted at 03:27 pm by BlackandWhite
[For me?]

ITS TURBO TIME!

Today = retardedness.
But yet it was 19847583 times better than yesterday. I dunno, I was just in a good mood.

Woke up at 4:47 and looked out the window. No snow. Went back to bed woke up at 6, still no snow. Thus. School. Got dressed and looked like crap but didn't care and went to school. Got interims. # friggin b's. Not good. In order for my mom to be happy I need all a's and one b (in math of course). Mrs Trice gave me an 81 when the tests we've taken this quarter i've gotten a 97, 100, and 95 and turned in all my work. Wtf. Mr M gave me an 83 but he never gives us work so I don't care. Thrn was matho. Did nothing. Spanish watched jingle all the way. IT'S.. TURBO TIME! Doop doop then was fashion tech. WE WATCHED PIRATES OF THE CARRIBEAN. Me and Bebe were on the verge of passing out. "Here he comes.. wait... now... wait... THERE HE IS!!!" Mmm, depp. Then was... that class? Oh! Science. We watched a movie on volcanoes and i fell asleep and i woke up and saw this old guy on the TV and you wanna know what I said? "Is that... the pope?" Go me. Then we watched the weather channel. Yay. Lunch sat and ate. AND IT WASN'T HELL TODAY. On the way to 6th period me and sammy sang love songs to eachother which included shut up, l is for the way you look at me song thing, and something else.. how does it go.. oh well. Went to english and we watched major payne. That movie is so funny. I was sitting with diana, chuck, and kevin and chuck said that he liked my shirt and that it was sexy (bc it has stripes on it ---> he loves stripes) then the sub gave us candy and she gave chuck a donut! I got a peice of it, but in return i have to give him my body for chirstmas.. hahaha. Then kevin took my scarf and wrapped it around his head so he couldnt breathe.... Then was l/s/n had a pop quiz... got a 100% on it. I have a 100.5 in that class right now. Teehe. Uh... then? Health. Cory and Derrick decided to come sit with me so they did. Oh, joyous. Off Stoddard used me as an example, and said "Okay, so you are dating him *points to cory*. he gets a million dollar bond so you put up your house just bc you love him so much. Day before court, he says adios and heads off to brazil and now youre living in a paper box." It was so great but I had to shoot an evil look at Cory. WHAT DOES BRAZIL HAVE THAT I DONT? He said, "Everything". Hah i will shoot him officially. BUT THEN Derrick goes "SINCE YOU ARE IN BRAZIL CAN I HAVE JOCHUM?" I am so sick of him. After class we were joking about how he left me for brazil and derrick goes "How could you leave jochum shes hot". Ew. Ew. and double merde. I was about to leave and Derrick comes up and goes "Sooo jochum how is the boyfriend"
"Oh, Scott?  *in the most cheerful way* HE IS JUST FANTASTIC!!"
"Oh... are you going to meet him now?"
"*sighs* I would, but as you see, he is in new york right now."
"Oh... so you and him are doing good...?"
"Yup!"
"*walks away disappointed*"

Man. I was <-> that close to saying "Mate, you need a girl." (from PIRATES, ive said it atleast 20 times today to random guys all of which look at me like im insane).  But Derrick really needs to sop with this, its tiring and retarded and JUST BECAUSE CORY LEFT ME FOR BRAZIL AND SCOTT IS IN NEW YORK DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN SAY THAT AND STOPPPPP CALLING ME JOCHUM! Kay, not like he will ever read that. But I should tell him that, bc one day i'm gunna end up kicking him in the balls. Anywho, so I guess today wasn't as bad as i thought it would be.

RIDING THE FRIGGIN CRIMSON WAVE,
-Jessi

Posted at 03:25 pm by BlackandWhite
[For me?]

Thursday, December 4
her heart like a crystal...

I took a break, and since me and jay were talking about csi camp, i made a song and i will give it to him for christmas. None of it will make sense to you.. just to jay and kara and lizzy... here it is:

teachers with manly voices and leopard thongs
hey lets go smoke a bong
maybe then we could inspect the bong
with noodles and tweezers and sing this song
bloody tuesday bloody tuesday
HALT! keep away from mr green the gay!
who killed him?
was it you?
it was her
for she loves my white homemade shoe
dont look now
but the janitors coming
coming to get my lab coat
bc i am the real slim shady
come now dance with the flower children
as we play weezer music on the keyboard
and hop around while kid plays kickball
with his brother with a mullet
i shoulda taken a pellet
killed the kid
then we'd have something to inspect
like inspector gadget and penny
with his helicopter hat
but all we had was tweezers and noodles
and i am allergic to the hair of a cat
oh lets get some coke
make it explode
with the m & m's
and famous amos
just like jesse jame-us
there are memories of many
please, dont fall in the hole of matrimony.
I AM A HOMOSEXUAL

I know its retarded but its not supposed to be anything but. Merry Xmas jay! He said he saw the teacher at the groc store and shes having another camp just for high schoolers uh oh. . . so i'll have to round up kara and lizzy so we can all go again. Maybe Mr. Warfield can die again. Yay, death! Lol, just kidding. I feel better than I did earlier bc I talked to a few people so its all good now, you know?

bagel,
j

Posted at 07:15 pm by BlackandWhite
[For me?]

on the verge of a break down

This is pretty much a rant and i'll probably come off like a retard in it so if you are gunna criticize me, dont read it. Maybe I should tell it to that creepy guy in health.

Wow. Today was completely pointless. I have never been this happy to be home. So got to school and same old same old. Bebe sat by me in math and we listened to An N*Sync Christmas! YAY! I didn't know any of the songs... sigh. But that is okay. We had the volume on full blast on the cd player.. Then listened to AFI and Something Corporate (wanted to see if jessie could stand it... and she could! yay! well she kinda has to bc her boyfriend in california probably will be performing with them soon and hes gunna get her a backstage pass which means he must get me one too... i doubt this will ever happen. oh well.) so I guess math was pretty good. In spanish mrs trice told us how her almost-sister (long story short- she was an exchange student at some familys house and became close with their daughter so its like her sister) was diagnosed with breast cancer 4 years ago, and then she passed away a few days ago... it really ruined the mood in the class. I'm sick of all this talk of dying and death... one word mentioned about it and it messes up my day now. I dunno why but it does... well atleast in spanish we watched Jingle All The Way (with AHNOLD) and she let us watch it in english so it was all good. PHIL HARTMAN ROCKS MY SOCKS IN THAT MOVIE (and in kiki too ofcourse). Then was fashion tech where mrs kick talked for a bit and I saw scott walk by and got kinda confused but he was going to the doctors so its all good. Then, I listened to Something Corporate. Amazing, eh? Science TRIDENT* was trying to get this one curly thing to curl in her hair the whole time. Then HELEN COY sat next to me. Great. She got back her test (so did i) and she was like "Oh, thank you. I am ever so happy. I passed the test.. I thought for sure I would not pass." i asked her for her calc. to see what my grade was and I mumbled ''66'' and she was like "Well, study harder next time." Kiss my bung hole. I hate people like her, but yet she didn't even do anything. Then was lunch which was hell again but ashley and nick stopped by which was v good. Ashley gave me a two page note so thank you ash! I enjoyed reading it.. teehe. In mr cappers did a long worksheet and my head was killing me, so i missed the pep rally to come into mr cappers room and sit in the quiet. Quiet, yeah right. Everyone was in there. the room was jammed packed with kids. Diana, Bebe, Jamie, Jamie, Mark, Sammy, Zack, Juliane, and Devin were also there. First time in forever we've all been together, and for some reason I just didn't care. I wanted to get out of there. And every person in the classroom was yelling and it was so loud my head was killing me even more. I wanted to go home so bad. I didn't have my CD player to drown everyone out which sucked.. Since we didnt have 7th period i went straight to health where we went to the gym. I sat there and listened to guess who... something corporate. Creepy guy (who says im sarcastic and whatnot) came up to me and asked what I was listening to so I showed him the CD.

"Aw man you listen to that crap?"
"Its not crap and yes"
"don't tell me you like that emo bull"
"so what if i do?"
"well have you ever heard *names some song*?"
"no."
"you consider yourself emo and youve never heard of that?"
"i don't consider that."
"well its like the ultimate song to kill yourself too"
"*mumbles* maybe you should listen to it *mumbles*"
"What?"
"Nothing."
"Well tell me you like some other music. you like greenday?"
"Yup."
"I love them. Ever been to one of their concerts?"
"Yup."
"The only concert i am going to is the grateful dead concert which i know sucks but at least i get to go and take drugs in the parking lot"
"Well, isn't that fun? *rolls eyes*"
*bell rings*

I wanted to hurt him so bad. Then was walking while it was snowing and for some god foresaken reason i almost started to break down. I have no idea whats going on, not been myself at all lately. Ever since tuesday i've been so freaking emotional and its pissing me off. I think I just need a break from everyone and everything and just chill out and think and whatnot, and it will all be good. Yeah, a break is what I need. All I need. Man, Scott's leaving for new york tomorrow. This is gunna suck. STOP BEING SO EMOOOOOTTTTIIIIOOOOOONAL! There. I feel better.

Listening to some guy calling me a retard (fun, huh),
-Jessi

Posted at 04:03 pm by BlackandWhite
[For me?]

Wednesday, December 3
this conversation's still dead on arrival

tonights been a good night, great night. talked to willay, he drew me a kickin picture. which i showed to ashley, who then also drew me a picture. I am just that loved, huh? willie was tryin to be sneaky about what he thinks hes gunna get me for my xmas gift, but i got it right on the first guess. I am just that cool. Talked to jamie... shes gunna shoot me bc i found nbc pillow cases.. oh yes. so im just in a good mood, and listening to something corporate still. I love number one on the CD so much. I don't know why. when i first listened to 'me and the moon' i hated it but now its one of my favorites. Bebebebe. Talked to manday too. she's having some problems with jared and i hope everything goes okay bc i love her and jared has a cool brother and if they break up i cant talk to his brother anymore. hahaha thats sounds kinda mean but i have good intentions, and wish her the best. me and jill talked about our 6th grade memories. i wouldnt give those up for the world.
EXCUSE ME EXCUSE ME BUT I THINK YOU HAVE FIELD RAGE. FIEEEEEEEELD. RAGE. *WRITES IT IN THE DIRT* I THINK YOU NEED A HUG. HUG.
That was a great day... man. i'd love to relive those days, me and her had an awesome time in 6th grade. I still love the memory of me going to her house, and dani left the note in jills gate saying to call her and left her number, so we called the number and this lady who was sleeping answered everytime THERE IS NO DANI HERE! and when we finally got her number she was all like IS SOME ONE OVER WHY ARENT I OVER THERE and then we both saw the peice of paper at the same time and has some serious ESPN and crinkled up the paper... OH DANI DANI I CANT HEAR YOU IM LOSING YOU I -- *CLICK*... then she came over.. and jill ran upstairs behind jordy and i hid behind the couch. WHAT NO ONES OVER HERE WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT... Man, I MISS YOU JILL!!!
About everything that happen yesterday I feel a lot better about it. I can kick the sickness arse. hahaha, with the help of jill and willie (i first typed jillie and will..) of course *big grin*. I dunno, I'''''''m happy right now, so I guess all that matters, right?

Thats all from this instant potato tonight.

Eating the crumbs of munchies from the bottom of the bag and pondering my next move
-Jessi

Posted at 09:13 pm by BlackandWhite
[For me?]

ah, now its on to pink thongs!

Good job nick. I am proud of your pink thong. Your sister knows. Hahahaha.

Sorry, had to say that.

  So today! Talked to Didi on the bus about everything. I have knack for making people cry I suppose. Either that or they love me! Yay! Love! We'll say they just love me. Ms Isaac was postive me and bebe were skipping yesterday so i made her feel all bad and it was trés worth it. She had the nerve to ask bebe if there was any good movies coming out (bc someone ratted on jessie and said that she was skipping to buy pirates) and ahg-like. Then was spanish, then fashion. We did nothing. Oh, Mrs Kick lost our passes so me and jessie had to BACK to ms isaac. When we got in there, all these juniors and seniors were like "Hey girl in the red (me.) did you go to henson?" and I was like... yeah.... and this one girl asked if my name was jessica... and i was like yeah... I don't know how they know me but whatever. Its all good. Urm... yeaaah. Mr M is retarded. *shakes head* every time he sees me and scott he makes some comment. Lunch is always hell lately. Like, not all lunch, but the first 15 minutes is. I dont know why. But thats alright. In mr capper we watched a movie and read with people with funny french accents. Mme. Mithilde! She was interesting indeed. In l/s/n mrs u said we had to work in pairs and literally three or four people yelled out my name. I must be the only smart person. Who yelled my name? Wednesday did, Jamie who sits behind me, Patrice, and that girl who sits across the room.. michelle? It was great. I worked with Martia, bc mrs u told me to. Then! Was health! Oh joyous health.. *rolls eyes*. Derrick kept shooting looks at me from across the room and it was oddly disturbing. We learned about the whole snitching thing. Or something along those lines.  "Yeah while you're sitting on your ass in jail Eric's sleeping with your girl!" -the police officer. That was about the only thing I caught and it was great. Then got on the bus, got yelled at by that kosher guy for being too loud, well, just told us we need to shut up bc he needed sleep, and we didnt of course. When I got home I had some v coke and it tasted like a shot. Or, er, felt like one, bc I drank just a sip and boom. Ohh that reminds me  I have a lollipop... yum. Hahaha I just saw the picture that I took infront of Eckerds of Scott, Diana, Juliane, her date, Sammy, and her date all dressed up for homecoming. That was so fun... me and diana running around with the vagisil and the animal house dancing dolls... Mmm good times good times. I could never forget that. Tomorrow we have yet another pep rally. Gah. FUN, huh? Well, I'm gunna look at some pictures. See ya later chickie baby (Hey Arnold! of course)

Watching heartache on T.V.,
Jessi

Posted at 03:24 pm by BlackandWhite
[For me?]

Tuesday, December 2
living in a world created to destroy

 

The rising tide will not let you forget me... forget me

Way to much something corporate lately. Better than dc, right Jamie? I've ruined a few people's nights, even made one of my best friends cry, and I feel awful. Completely horrible. I shouldnt have brought any of it upon them. I'm sorry. Honestly, I didn't mean to do it. Its just so much has happened today, so many things I've found out, none of which are good, and I dunno I'm just really confused about it. I'm 14, I shouldn't have to worry about these things. I mean, I dont think i deserve that. But, whatever. everything happens for a reason. So, yeah Just wanted to tell you guys im sorry and i love you all, goodnight.

Posted at 09:26 pm by BlackandWhite
[For me?]

teenage love was undergound.

What time are you starting this?: 812 pm
Name?: Jessi[ca]
Date of birth?: 10/20
Location?: waldorf
Where were you born?: waldorf
Have you ever failed a grade?: nope
Do you have a bf/gf?: yup
How long have you been together?: ermm a little over a week
What are you wearing right now?: coca cola shirt from the hancock apple festival and mh gym shorts
Would you have sex before marriage?: mmmmm...maybe.
Have you ever had a crush on any of your teachers?: hehe yes
Are you a virgin?: yes indeedo.
Do you smoke?: nope
Do you drink?: nope
Are you ghetto?: as ghetto as they come
Are you a player?: no?
What are your favorite colors?: yellow, red, white, black
What is your favorite animal?: dont know... hm.. PLATYPUS
Do you have any birthmarks?: on the back of my left leg
Have you ever gotten your arse kicked?: verbally yes, physically no
Who are your best friends?: they all know who they are
Have you ever beat someone up?: i beat up greg hehe
Who do you talk to most on the phone?: miran only bc she calls all the time lol other than that no one ever calls
Have you ever been slapped?: yeah
Do you get online a lot?: 'fraid so
Are you shy or outgoing?: it all depends
Do you shower?: yep.
Do you hate school?: i wouldn't say i hate it, so much as hate it..
Do you have a social life?: me and jamie had a social life that one day in august
How easily do you trust people?: too easily
Have you ever lied to your bestfriends?: Yeah, i'm sure everyone has...
Do you have a secret people would be surprised knowing?: yeah. not like im putting it here
Would you ever sky dive?: ive always wanted to do that
Do you like to dance?: depends. ddr dance? yes. dance dance? depends on which of the girls im with, and even then its like the chicken dance
Have you ever been out of state?: yep
Do you like to travel?: very much
Have you ever been expelled from school?: nope
Have you ever been suspended from school?: no
Do you want to get out of your hometown?: frick yes
Have you ever been dumped?: yup
Have you ever gotten high?: how did that old bumper sticker go? high on hugs, not on drugs!
What's your favorite drink?: SNAPPLE
Do you like Snapple?: OMFG HAHHA YES TIMES 237918379812379812798 SNAPPLE RULES THE PLANET (i love you like i love snapple!)
Do you drink a lot of water?: NO.
What toothpaste do you use?: im a colgate kid (colgate the whitest teeth to come by)
Do you have a cell phone or pager?: cell phone. does anyone carry around pagers anymore?
Are you a role model?: ally said she wanted to be just like me.
What kind of jewelry do you wear?: ring and earrings
What do you have pierced?: ears
Do you like taking pictures?: yep yep i took 67 today
Do you like getting your picture taken?: not really...im not photogenic
Do you have a tan?: this question is evil
Do you get annoyed easily?: not really anymore...only by bible pushers
Have you ever started a rumor?: nah. i'm sure i've passed one on a time or two, but i'm not the catalyst for that kinda thing.
Do you have your own phone/phone line?: yup
Do you have your own pool?: nope.
Do you have any siblings?: no
Have you ever been played?: um...a time or two?
Do you get along with your parents?: some of the time
How do you vent your anger?: music or talk to jamie (as always)
Have you ever run away?: thought about it a long time ago but no
Have you ever been fired from a job?: no.
Do you even have a job?: nope
Do you daydream a lot?: yeah
Do you have a lot of exes?: yeah *rolls eyes at their stupidness*
What are your favorite flowers?: ohie i love flowers gimme any flowers and i will love you forever and ever
What does your ex bf/gf look like?: umm haha which one... they range from short to tall to hardly any hair to longish hair so... blegh
What does your most recent BOYFRIEND(or crush[remember crushes get crushed]) look like?: "If you want to find him, find nemo, then find the emo, then youve found him" -me and diana on the bus
Have you ever been bitched out?: oh yes
When was the last time you bitched someone out?: i dont know its been a while
Are you rude?: try not to be
What was the last compliment you received?: i dont remember
Do you like getting dirty?: like...playing in the dirt dirty, or like...playing in the back seat of a car dirty? i'm confused.
Is your bellybutton an innie or outie?: innie
Are you flexible?: no but i have hyperactive reflexes!
What is your heritage?: german cherokee indian irish scottish
What is your lucky number?: dont have one
What does your hair look like right now?: like crap
Could you ever be a vegetarian?: yeah probably
When was your last real heartbreak?: hmm last year
Describe your looks?: 5'6'', skinny, brown hair, hazel eyes?
If you had to completely dye your hair it'd be what color?:ooh dark red
Would you ever date someone younger than you?: mmm depends
Would you ever date someone older than you?: i tihnk thats kinda self explanatory
Have you ever had an eating disorder?: no
Do you have one now?: no
How many rings until you answer the phone?: haha 4
Have you ever been skinnydipping?: haha yes
If yes, when was the last time?: probably about 2 years ago
Do you look more like your mother or father?: not sure i think i look like my dad but everyone else says i look a lot like my mom now
Do you ever cry to get your way?: not to get my way
If you had to amputate one limb, what would it be?: one of my legs
What phrase do you use most?: um... dont know
Are you the romantic type?: oh yes
Have you ever been chased by cops?: they came to my house BUT THEY DIDNT FIND ME so they interveiwed my neighbors... last december i think lol
What do you like most about your body?: whatever i dunno
What do you like least about your body?: i have the body of a 5th grader minus the height
When was the last time you threw up?: dunno
In the opposite sex, do you prefer blondes or brunettes?: not really a preference, but i tend to date guys with dark hair
What do the shoes you last wore look like?: black and chucks
Do you ever wear shirts to show your belly?: nope
What about cleavage?: i dont put on the shirt thinking "yes! this shirt will show my cleavage!"
Is your best friend a virgin?: yup *strikes the V sign*
What color are your underwear right now?: plain white bc i knew the doctor would see them... not in a sexual way hha
What theme does your room have?: random
What size shoe do you wear?: 8
What jewelry are you wearing now?: earrings
Would you pick a wedgie in public?: "Bebe! I cant get it out its like... so far up... it wont come out" "its gunna hurt when you take it out." -me and jessie on monday
How are you feeling right now?: worried but alright
What do you sleep in?: a bed.
What is one of your bad qualities?: i'm very indecisive and too trusting
What is one of your good qualities?: ummm you tell me
Would you marry for money?: no...
What do you drive?: i dont
Are you more of a mama or daddy's child?: dont know but i prefer my mom
What does your lj username mean?:i dont know
What's your favorite lj to read?: dunno
When was the last time you cried in school?: uh that monday when jessie and shane started going out... nov 20 ( i remember the date bc it was one month after my bday).
Do you wear Chucks?: almost everyday
What time are you finishing this?: 856, i stopped a lot to talk to people.

          Okay, I just did a survey... yay. I only did it bc i saw the snapple question, lol.


Posted at 09:01 pm by BlackandWhite
[For me?]

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